MaryB and the City

Single again, sorta.

While managing the emotions of Mr. Big coming in, then moving out of my life in the blink of an eye - and pretty bummed that our epic hangouts on a regular basis are more or less over - it occured to me that there are actually some perks to my predicament on paper. As I’ve discovered over the course of this week.

And I love a list. So here is one that covers the positives.

Top Ten Reasons Why Dating Someone Long Distance Isn’t So Bad:

10. The monotonous and dreadful act of shaving a 1/3 of my body is a past time. Now I pick up the Mach 3 Turbo only when necessary. And, the best part is, just in time for a change of season with fall’s long pants and tights.

9. In 5 days flat, I had two emergency calls from friends. Ok maybe 911 wasn’t on stand-by, but there was a need for support and I was there, front & center. Even if Mr. Big was here, I still would have shown up, without fail. But having absolutely zero distractions or commitments certainly made the availability that much easier.

8. On Sunday, I actually participated in society and accomplished big & small tasks. Whereas for the last few months, from sunrise to sunset, the traditional day of rest was spent with him on the couch watching big burly men tackle each other in spandex pants. While on the surface, that in itself is not painful whatsoever, it did hinder me from doing other activities. Like going to church, grocery shopping, gyming it, writing my book, and reading a book.

7. You don’t know what you have til it’s gone doesn’t apply here, since our reconcilation is still so new. However, not having the luxury of driving 10 minutes for a sitdown dinner, must-see TV marathon, or renting a movie…definitely makes you appreciate when we will see each other in the flesh again.

6. Speaking of, being apart enables us to plan ahead, which consequently gives us things to look forward to. Like meeting him at the airport, then off to our getaway at a lakehouse this weekend.

5. My closest friends [and now the blogosphere world] thinks this is absolutely ridiculous, but we are practicing antiflatulents. In almost a decade, we’ve never once publicly passed gas in front of each other. The average person produces about half a liter of gas per day, distributed over about fourteen farts. So it goes without saying -all of the newly allotted alone time allows for liberation and release of oxygen, nitrogen, and methane.

4. Going out on the town - be it a weeknight happy hour or a weekend throwdown -surrounding males excreting testosterone does not phase me. Being able to fully focus on my company in tow without any eligible bachelor desires whatsoever is super fun.

3. When in the crux of everyday life, it is easy to become complacent. But when you’re dating long distance, inevitably it forces you to be, well, sweeter. Like the beautiful vase of flowers I received yesterday at the office. About a dozen coworkers have walked by asking, “What’s the occasion?” My answer is “just because” — which is true. Except it’s also because I had a mini meltdown Sunday night from reaching maximum stress levels that he got the brunt of. Whereas maybe normally we would have hugged it out with a cuddle, Mr. Big went the extra mile to embrace me across the miles through a lovely delivery of fresh blooms.

2. Not having the luxury of face-to-face chats fosters much more conversation. Under regular circumstances we might have fancied 5 or 10 minute chats here and there, but now our nightly dialogue always passes the hour mark. And for a woman, there is nothing that makes you feel closer to a man than a hearty, satisfying bowl of talk soup.

1. Staying connected over state lines is the ultimate test to see how serious a partner is. Simply put, this experience will make or break us. And we’ve already studied for what is the equivalent of a GED, SAT, GMAT, LSAT and MCAT. There are no do-overs and the only grade is pass or fail.

So while the angst of navigating this new remote territory together is present, I’m hopeful that the time apart doesn’t have to be so painful. Except perhaps the 5 o’clock shadow on my legs.